Week…I officially stopped counting…

I was going to go back and count the weeks it’s been since I ever very first wrote to you but, I don’t think we need me to do that.

The point is, this has been going on for hundreds of weeks at this point - not me writing love notes, I’ve definitely taken an unintentional step back from those, but Pilates People in general.

For the rest of where I’m going with this to make any kind of sense, you, dear friend, need to know that I’m currently on a hiatus from my regular teaching practice for a lot of reasons…including, but not limited to, this. I wanted to have some time to start this again.

When I think back to the beginning of Pilates People, writing love notes is one of my fondest memories. I would cozy up with a coffee, tea or sometimes the mezcal margarita I’d had delivered from Pearl’s with a side of toilet paper (yes, I bought my toilet paper via alcohol because they always gave it as a “side” back in the days when none of us could get toilet paper), go out on my fire escape or sit in the big leather chair that was slowly falling to pieces in my living room after years of people cozying up into it…and write to you because I missed you and I wanted you to know that I’m still here, and if you’re reading this then, so are you.

A lot of things swirled around in my head when I decided I wanted to do that again today - find a cozy spot in my new home, drink my coffee and get back to something I love - but I THINK I settled on something and I THINK (although I haven’t checked myself, feel free to fact check me and report back on this) it’s something we haven’t talked about before!

Muscle contractions.

Now, listen, there is a lot going on here and I would need much more than a love note of a reasonable length to cover it all but, here’s what I’m thinking about in particular today:

• your muscle contractions are what’s responsible for any and all movement in your body. Without these various contractions, things not only just stand still, they also fall apart because certain joints (ie, your shoulder) rely on your muscles to hold everything together.

• you have 3 different muscle contractions that can occur in your body:

  • concentric contractions - when the muscle shortens (think your biceps in a bicep curl and note that this is movement based)

  • eccentric contractions - when the muscle lengthens against force (think your inner thighs in light springed side splits on the reformer and note that this is movement based)

  • isometric contractions - when the length of the muscle does not change but a contraction is needed to hold the position (think, plank - there’s no movement once you’re in the position but in order to hold it, your muscles in your abs, legs and arms need to be working)

Let’s talk about that concentric contraction example a little more. There is another concept that goes into that kind of contraction - agonist and antagonist muscles.

In this example (a bicep curl), your bicep is the agonist and your tricep is the antagonist.

What does that mean? An agonist muscle is the muscle whose contraction is the cause of the movement in your joint. For example, in a bicep curl the concentric contraction of your bicep causes your elbow to bend.

On the flip side of that, the antagonist muscle (in this case, your tricep) needs to do the opposite movement of the agonist in order for the movement to occur. So while the bicep shortens and contracts to bend your elbow, your tricep HAS TO relax and lengthen, or nothing will happen.

It makes me think of the song “Something’s Got To Give” by Labrinth. Maybe go turn that on while you keep reading? It was one of my anthems during the pandemic. I listened to it on repeat running through the empty city streets on my way to the space that would one day become our studio.

Anyway…

Something’s got to give is my point today, and as with most things in life (I think), our bodies can teach us a thing or two about it.

Let’s go back to that bicep curl and pretend your bicep contracted and your tricep DIDN’T let go, what happens?

You have a seriously stressed out bicep because it’s working hard to create movement but, without your tricep releasing, your elbow doesn't move.

And the beauty of the relationship is that it’s reciprocal - when it’s your triceps’ turn to straighten your elbow (that’s its main job), your bicep HAS TO relax and lengthen, or nothing will happen.

Have you ever seen a person who clearly lifts a jillion pounds every day in a bicep curl over and over and over again? Have you ever noticed that their elbows are typically bent and seem unable to fully straighten? That’s because their biceps literally CAN’T relax anymore. They don’t know how and their triceps aren’t strong enough to overpower their biceps’ need to contract.

This is where I gently remind us all that in order to be healthy, a muscle needs to be able to engage AND relax. If it’s stuck in either mode, we have some work to do.

Funny enough, same can be said of you.

YOU need to be able to engage AND relax. If you’re stuck in one of those places and can’t seem to get to the other…we have some work to do.

And yes, I fully and firmly believe that for some of us, relaxing can be work.

Hiit’smeI’mthesomeofusandI’mtryingmybesttoworktorelaxandit’sgoingprettywellbutIthinkyoushouldknowthatmyversionofrelaxingstillincludeseightplushourworkdayseventhoughI’mnotcurrentlyteachingrightnowandI’malsomarathontrainingsoreallyismybreakevneabreakatall…I’mnotsurereallybutI’lljustkeepworkingonitokaythanksbye.

But learning to relax is important work. It’s necessary work. Do the work.

We currently live in a culture and world that is asking everything of us - work hard, make money, contribute to society, consume the media - all of it, all of the time, forever - support your friends, support your family, eat “right,” get enough sleep, exercise as much and as hard as you can, read books, educate yourself, don’t trust what you read, see or hear, have an opinion, know that your opinion is wrong, read again, educate again, don’t trust again…it’s exhausting.

It’s all so exhausting.

If we were all biceps I swear, the world would just be a bunch of bent elbows and triceps fighting for their lives to straighten them begging us to just please for one second let go.

And please don’t misunderstand me. I know that all of that is important too. That’s work we need to do.

But…we need to be able to let the work go sometimes as well.

But letting go is scary, right? What happens when you let go? Do you lose your job? Do your kids get stranded at school because no one remembered to pick them up? Does the world fall apart?

I hope not. But I get the fear and the reflex to keep holding on and bending that elbow for dear life because oh my god what if my tricep isn’t ready for this?

…but you’ll never know until you try…and you can’t live a full life if your elbows are always stuck bent out of tension, overwork, exhaustion and fear.

So what’s step one in attempting to release? I think it might be identifying your triceps - what do you have already that will make letting go okay? What and who is ready to work into the next part of this movement with you?

You don’t have to have big, profound answers.

For me, one of my triceps was very simply, “Wow, I might have time to write a love note again.”

That’s a seemingly small promise of a thing I want to do and haven’t had time to do that just happens to matter to me. It’s not lifting a ton of weight or contributing to carrying the load of work I need taken care of. But, it mattered.

And as I continued to add on triceps that could support me letting go a little bit - my husband, my family, my staff, our community - it started to feel like I could do it.

I could try to start letting go.

My point is, just like our muscles, each of us should be able to be the agonist or the antagonist in a moment depending on what’s needed.

It’s not healthy or safe to be stuck in agonist mode and eventually, something will give - whether that’s your ability to straighten your arms, your mental health or your ability to show up for someone else when they really need you.

But unwinding a contraction pattern is hard work. This isn’t an overnight light switch flip, my friends. Muscles need to be retrained slowly over time.

You are a body comprised entirely of muscles going into and out of these contractions, and we haven’t even touched this at all yet today really but, those contractions are also controlled by your emotional state.

Isn’t the body SO COOL?! (and such a pain in the ass)

It’s going to take some time to unwind things, and that’s okay.

Your job?

Be patient.

Be present.

And know that the work can and still is happening, even in the small moments.

Even when the answers aren’t all that profound.

I’m still here, friends. So are you.

All my love, always.
Cassandra + Pilates People